I wish I was able to eat as much as I want without having to worry about my weight. Or the amount of unhealthy shit I’m putting in my body. I just want to be in a world full of food and eat my way through the day without feeling sick or feeling bloated. I just want to eat. All day long. Hmmmm. 

On another note, got my midsem test result back today... feel so relieved :') #hardworkdoespayoff and thankyou for all the good luck wishes I've received in my emails #blessed :)

Had the most busiest study break. ever. Can't believe it's over soon and back to uni tomorrow waaah! D:

Brief jot down points of what happened:
- long weekend: Harmonise Camp
- Tuesday: outing at Royal Show
- Wednesday: outings. again.
- Thursday: outing and working *tired*
- Friday: shopping with mum *hot and tired*
- Saturday: working and friend's party
- Sunday: outing with family
And...... as expected... minimal study was done! :(
Can't believe in about a month time, exams will be here... holy shmoly... I ain't ready yet!

Oh ya, if you have been following my instagram, I have created another blog dedicated to reviewing products and food (eventhough it still is quite empty at the moment), here's the LINK if you don't know! Hopefully I can do more reviews for you all to read, despite my study load!

Ta for now! Catchaa all soon, my lovelies! :)

Love,
Velene xoxo

And all of sudden, she changed. She came back a completely different person, with a new mindset, a new outlook, a new soul. The girl that once cared too much about everything, no longer cared at all.

I can’t stop thinking about you.

From the moment I wake up, till I fall asleep, you won’t get out of my head. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, but it seems like I’m falling for you more and more as the day goes by and I have no control what so ever over it. I like this feeling, but it frightens me that one day, like everyone else, you’ll just be a memory, my past. 

Sometimes I feel like words are all I have.

Other times I feel like my thoughts are awake and nocturnal. Unlike all else, words are eternal. Once printed they can never be erased. Once spoken they can never be taken back. Words comfort me at two in the morning and as I'm awake, I realise how utterly alone I am. I think they are nocturnal. They make me tear-up, make me feel all vulnerable, make me think twice and change the way I view the world and everything within it. And writers, they’re dangerous because they are the masters of words. I can spend hours reading. Imagination and creativity are some of the elements in literature. Writers knead and mold the brains of children; the best writers can even do this with adults. Writers have this uncanny ability to delve into the deepest depths of the heart and extract poems we didn't even know existed. They can snowball the simplest of ideas into the most intricate fiction pieces. And for that reason, it’s not the dark we should fear, but the writer’s ability to turn on the light.

Right now, I feel like "change" has come back and starting to haunt me. With my thoughts changing. With my preference changing. With all these strings lying around for me yet to fix. With all these lil things to sort out. With founding out shits that I ain't suppose to know. With my changing perception of certain people that I'm close with. They are all changing. This frightened me, for I feel like I'm pushed to the corner of the corner, with no one to confide to and with everyone's moving and changing so fast, I'm scared that I wouldn't be able to catch up. And by the time I catch up, it'd be all too late...

It’s weird to think that right now, while I have sleepy eyes and weary thoughts, some people are wide awake, on the other side of the world. People are probably bustling around, grabbing a fresh cup of coffee or hurrying to their work or enjoying the sun; while I’m here, lying on my bed. 
And right here, right now, it isn’t quite lonely anymore. 
Life doesn't seem that bad. Just because it’s dark now doesn't mean the light is gone. Just like how the sun still exists even though it’s late at night and the moon is my only comfort. On the other side of the world, my tomorrow is their today; and that, for some reason, gives me comfort too - their yesterday is my today and life goes on.

You were never mine. You weren't mine to begin with and not mine to end with.

Resisting the urge to talk to you, knowing how much heartache that could possibly bring if I do so..

I would say that I am proud of myself for resisting the urge to talk to you, but that wouldn't exactly be the truth. I’m left feeling a confusing mix of relief and disappointment. I know that I made the more responsible, rational, and self-respectful choice. But I can’t help but feel as though I've missed out on an important opportunity. An opportunity for what? I have no idea. 

You know that feeling of your heart dropping when you find out that your loved one has been trying to hide something from you? Yeah, not the greatest feeling in the world. It might not mean shit to you, but it sure means a hell lot to me. So save your sugar-coated bullshits for someone else. Come at me with one hundred percent honesty. The naked truth is always better than the best dressed lie. 

You can have it all.

You just can't have it all at once.