I used to get so sad when I realised just how much everything has changed. The dynamic with all of my friendships have definitely shifted, and I used to wallow in self-pity that nothing’s ever going to go back to how it used to be and I couldn’t do anything about it.

… but I’ve realised now that, that’s just life. I can’t be angry that things are different because that’s how life happens. It’s immature and childish to play victim when all we’re trying to do is grow up.
I want so bad for everyone to succeed, and if I get to play a role in helping someone achieve their dreams by offering my friendship, then that makes me happy.
If someone I love needs to grow on their own to achieve their goals and forgets me on the way, then yea, I’ll be a little sad, but I’ll still be happy for them because in the end, they succeeded.

I’m the kind of friend that’ll always be there for you even if we haven’t spoken in months. If you come to me when you feel like you’re carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders, I will listen and I will comfort you.

If you drop by just to say hi and ask how life’s going, I will reciprocate with just as much love and affection. Other than that, I will quietly appreciate and admire how differently everyone’s growing.

Within the past year, I’ve learned that, at this age especially, you cannot expect for everyone to stay in your life the same way they’ve been for the past couple of years. This is the age where we need to be selfish to figure ourselves out… what we want to do, where we want to be, and how we want to achieve it.
Whether or not everyone stays for the ride, I’m just gonna do me.

You might not be in control of what happens in your life, but you are in control of how you will react to the hardships that are thrown at you. If you’re not content with your life, change it, better it, keep it moving. Shit does happen, but it’s not an excuse to use every time something bad occurs. Only you have the ability to transform your life.

I wish my eyes were like a camera.

If they were like a camera, I would be able to take pictures of everything from my very first breath to present day in my life. Everything I've been through, all the mistakes I've made, lessons learnt and so on. I'd store all these pictures in my head and record my life. Then I’d be able to look at my life from an external perspective. And last but not least, before I die, I would rewind my whole life from the beginning to the end, replaying my whole life in my head before my last breath.

Fading away.....

Doesn’t it hurt when the conversations with your friends die? Whether it’s best friends, good friends, or just people you hang out with, they just tend to disappear from your life and you have no idea why. It hurts to see the people you love become just a memory no matter how good the times you had together.... everything just fades away.

I want to be like a child again.

I want to be secured again, to be fearless and full of confidence, to not be stressed over constantly trying to get the highest grades, to not be full of regrets, full of pain, I want to go back to feeling that happiness by just watching my favorite cartoon and colouring in my colouring book and not have to worry about what some low life bitches thinks of me nor cry over some douche.

Being able to find someone you click with so naturally is the best feeling ever. You feel like you’ve been best friends for your whole life, it feels like you’re coming home. You’re so comfortable with them. Maybe that’s what a SOULMATE is. Not someone who shares every single thing in common with you, but someone who feels like home.

I think the worse thing you could ever hear from a friend is them telling you that they feel like they are not a good enough friend to you when they have done so much for you.. They don’t see what you see in them, their strong spirit and their kind heart. It hurts to hear they feel worthless and a waste of space and nothing you say or do will make them see or change the way they think.

There is a point where you can’t communicate any longer with another person because their head is so far up their butt they can’t see their own self-righteousness or hear anything you have to say. Sad.

Alohaaa everybody! I'm baack from Taiwan, here's the post I wrote on facebook :)

"I am missing Taiwan already :') 這段旅程遇到了好多人事物 也學了好多東西! Went solo travel on the last day and I realised: 

(a) I'm free to adventure as I please, and it feels awesome (yes it's awesome too when travelling in a group), there is no need to compromise when travelling alone. Travelling alone gave me the choices of travelling to where I want, when and however I want to – all with a liberating degree of indulgence; and (b) gained a deep understanding of the destinations I’ve visited. I felt like I feel more immersed in my surroundings. I noticed the unique quirks, and subtle character that truly makes a place what it is. And and and and!! Got to meet 炎亞綸 Aaron Yan in real life and shook his hands omg!🙈 Transit-ing in KL right now and will be back in Perth soon. 就快回到快節奏的生活 是時候從夢中醒來了 為下一次的旅程而努力 加油😂 Will be editing travel vlogs and be uploading them on youtube when I go back!"

Can't believed the past 17 days had gone so fast! 

And also from fb:

"Did some reflecting over the trip and decided to write them down. I only see the end but often neglect the process. There is much to be experienced even if the end isn't ideal. I will stop giving up before even trying. I guess sometimes it's the journey that counts. Work on things within my capacity and not worry about what is beyond my control. Know that at least I tried. (How hard should I try; I've yet to figure out) Maybe life doesn't have to be a struggle. Accept that some things are not meant to be. Letting go. 旅行的心情 - 因為生活太匆忙 總是只能在旅行的時候才能放慢腳步慢慢觀察眼前的人事物 然後認識不一樣的自己 也許想法會改變 也許會對事情改觀 我也在這次的旅程中找到新的想法。"

I have learnt A LOT while travelling, all in - the conference and post camp itself.

Anyways,  I shall leave it here for now, gotta go back and start editing my travel vlogs :) 

I'll be back posting regularly from now on too :)

Love,

Velene xoxo