I feel that..

..the cutest relationship would be two people who are truly comfortable with each other, like they could be doing nothing all day but still having the best time with each other presence. They don’t need all the surprises, cute videos and pictures, to prove to others that their relationship is great, although those are included in their relationship from time to time. 
Actually, I just like couples who don’t publicise their relationship meaning they keep most of their relationships to themselves. Sometimes all the couples I see online are just too much/too overrated. I mean with all the surprises they share, have the same ideas. It does get old, but that’s just my opinion ayee.

I've created this blog only to extract how I feel.

Thoughts that over-pound my soul and mind leaving me bombarded and helpless. Who would have known how a simple blog could bury and hide so much from the outside world. Things that are left here, stories that are written here, memories that haunt the mind here, thoughts that are scattered all over the pages that seem never-ending, are all too complex in this narrative.
This is the place where I could escape and not have to worry about anyone or anything, but myself. A place where I may be critiqued, yet heard. An accommodation of unknown thoughts, but a place where people can listen and travel with. Questions left unanswered, thoughts venting out - letting it out in this bewildering passage.
A dimension where people have managed to stay hidden between pages and name; I myself have included as well.

Confession:

I miss you. It’s not the type of longing that I am used to, it’s weird, because I don’t necessarily miss you, I miss us. Everything we were, everything we could have been. Those late nights, long conversations.. The way you were able to turn everything bad in my life good.

PS. I know I've been MIA (I'm still alive! :P) these days, so I'm gonna try my best to at least write 2 posts each week :)

Confession:

I usually look at the worst possible side of every situation, and I make big deals out of the simple things. Too often, I let my emotions take over my thoughts then I end up getting over emotional for the stupidest reason. Others can’t understand how I feel, and I never bother to explain because my problems are the ones I create for myself and they don’t actually exist. I know over-thinking only leads to unhealthy thoughts but hey, there’s nothing I can do to stop myself.

"Relationships now a days equals one male, one female, one home wrecking bitch, one ex talking shit and one friend secretly trying to break you guys up." - Drake

Guys are so cute when they talk about their feelings.

Some of you don’t like me.

I know that.
I respect your opinion about me. I notice but I don’t react to it. I don't care. Then there’s some of you who have been sending me anon messages to hope I die. What’s your problem? I’ve been going through a rough time, and by you saying that it makes me feel gut worse than I already am. But I’d appreciate it if you leave me alone. I mean would it make you feel better, to watch me as I bleed? To watch me suffer? It’s not like I haven’t been suffering enough already..

That feeling where you just want to disappear.

I think it’s a cry for help. 
Because sometimes people do actually feel that way. 
Sometimes your life feels like it’s caving in on you. At times there are people out there who really do feel like they don’t want to exist, like they just want to curl up in a ball and go into that place between life and death. 
When they say things such as ‘I don’t want to exist’ isn’t saying ‘I want to die’. It’s saying ‘I wish for the time being that I can escape this place call reality and just not feel’.
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that, and you don’t know how it feels to be this way then you have no place to judge anyone who does.

Dear old me,

What happened to you? You slowly faded away. You vanished, you were by my side and then you left. What did I do to make you leave? Was it because I was changing or was it because I was maturing? Please come back, I missed you. Things are getting hectic and I miss your carefree ways. I miss the way you would smile and actually meaning it. I miss my joyful expression and happiness when you were around. Now everything is just so out of place. Everybody left to right questioned where you’re at, did you die or are you lost? I’m sorry for all the changes and all the shit I've been doing. But here I stand with the new me and I’m slowly losing you. I’m sorry. I love you, and I miss you.

Love,
Me